Early DFB Mailing List Archives
From: daryoush.mansouri@adn.alcatel.com (Daryoush Mansouri)
To: mark@naweb.com (mark kennedy), janssemp@wfu.edu
Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 17:11:52 -0500 (EST)
Subject: Potential DFB sighting
Gentlemen, I hereby call to order the first meeting of the Joint
Chiefs of Flush. I have gathered you to hammer out a concensus
and forge a policy on a hitherto-unencountered DFB issue.
Yesterday, I spotted a "Delaney REX VALVE" in the men's bathroom
of the Ed Sullivan Theater in Times Square. The issue at hand is
what to make of this new discovery. Is it acceptable to the
Triumvirate to include it in the DFB list, seeing how it is,
after all, a Coyne and Delany product? Or is this a significant
enough find to warrant its own new category? Having never before
encountered such an oddity, I can only surmise that the "REX VALVE"
is a highly-secret weapon in the Coyne & Delany arsenal, and my
stumbling upon it was a most fortuitous event. The question before
you, gentlemen, is "Is there enough love in your hearts for the
REX VALVE, or are you exclusively committed to the Flush Boy?"
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From: janssemp@wfu.edu
To: Daryoush Mansouri, mark kennedy
Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 17:18:28 -0500 (EST)
Subject: Re: Potential DFB sighting
Mr. Mansouri, your question is a difficult one, and I fully understand
your hesitation.
In my view, the Rex Valve seems worthy to be included in the official list
of DFB web sightings, if only because it was such an unusual occurrence.
Besides, the name "Rex Valve" is just as cool as "Flushboy." I would
include it, but perhaps under a separate heading in the official list.
MJ
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From: dmansou@adn.alcatel.com
To: janssemp@wfu.edu, mark@naweb.com
Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 17:35:55 -0500 (EST)
Subject: Re: Potential DFB sighting
Well then. 3 "yes" votes sounds unanimous to me.
Minutes of the first meeting of Joint Chiefs of Flush
02/24/98
- Situational briefing by Gen. Mansouri
- Battle plans presented by Gen. Mansouri
- Adm. Kennedy casts "Yes" vote, citing musical precedence in his
decision
- Adm. Kennedy's vote recorded by Gen. Mansouri
- Brig. Gen. Janssen casts "Yes" vote, citing peculiarity of the find,
as well as the "Rex Valve" moniker itself.
- Suggestion to categorize "Rex Valve" under separate heading on the
DFB page presented by Brig. Gen. Janssen, in essence promoting "Separate,
but equal" mentality.
- RESOLVED: The Delany Rex Valve shall find permanent residence on the
DFB page (Ref: http://www.patriot.net/users/mansouri/dfb/,
document #MIL753A-5Z) though under an as-yet-unspecified new heading,
pending final approval by all members of the Joint Chiefs of Flush.
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From: mark@naweb.com
To: dbodamer@asce.org, dmansou@adn.alcatel.com, janssemp@wfu.edu, wkoshuta@hns.com
Date: Tue, 2 Jun 1998 10:42:16 -0400
Subject: Gunned
Well, I just called Coyne & Delany at 804-296-0166 and spoke with
Peter Delany. "Turn-To-Silence" means that you can turn the knob on
the top of the valve to regulate the amount of water going through
the pipes.
This means that Big A was right, and I get the arm.
NO!
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From: "William Koshuta" [wkoshuta@hns.com]
To: Mark Kennedy, dbodamer@asce.org, dmansou@adn.alcatel.com
Date: Fri, 19 Jun 1998 14:54:44 -0400
Subject: holy shit!
MEN!
GREAT NEWS!
Hughes has Delany Flushboys!
I never noticed them before b/c they're only on the shitters. The urinals are
Royals, so I ASSumed that the crappers would be the same. I never checked b/c
I rarely use the throne anyway.
But now I can flush a Flushboy any ol' time I desire.
Oh joy!
And the photos....I can take more photos if need be.
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From: "pieper" [rpieper@rmc.edu]
To: dmansou@adn.alcatel.com
Date: Sun, 25 Oct 1998 15:47:45 -0500
Subject: This is a great day in "Flush-Boy" History!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is Pieper reporting some very good news.
I just found out that the ENTIRE conrad hall has "flush-boys" installed
in every bathroom. I dont know exactly how many there are, but there is
one for every two rooms and I think there are about 300 rooms! So I'm
guessing that there are approximately 150 "flush-boys."
I also sighted them in the "Brown Campus center." There are eight total.
I will continue my search as time goes on and will report in the near
future.
Sincerely,
pieper
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From: Ethan Kennedy [etkenned@vt.edu]
To: Friends.of.the.DFB@vt.edu
Date: Mon, 26 Oct 1998 02:41:21 -0500
Subject: DFB SIGHTING 10/23 & 10/24
Greetings friends,
I made an important discovery this weekend. Up until now I had
never seen the Flushboy. Or so I had thought. As it turns out, I
have used the Flushboy on many different occasions.
I was visiting Dave at UVA. Nature made its call. I answered by
taking a seat. As I was leaving the bathroom, a thought jumped
into my head. Was it possible? I leaned over and squinted my
eyes and tried to figure out what it said. It was barely legible, but
then I saw the three words of wisdom: "TURN TO SILENCE" The
words I was hoping for. It was then that I realized the DFB and I
had met before on many other occasions. I proceeded to go
upstairs to check out the urinals. Sure enough. Even the
commodes updstairs were DFB's. What a night.
Then as I was watching the UVA/NC State game at UVA's
stadium, I got another familiar call. I headed to the bathrooms.
Sure enough.
Now that my eyes have been trained, I will be able to spot them
with ease. I wonder if I will be able to locate any here in
Blacksburg. I will keep all of you posted, of course.
For those of you wondering, at Fiji house, one urinal was a Kohler
and the other one is believed to have been a Standard.
Thank god for the DFB!
Ethan
"TURN TO SILENCE"
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From: Ethan Kennedy [etkenned@vt.edu]
To: Friends.of.the.DFB@vt.edu
Date: Sun, 8 Nov 1998 16:16:57 -0500
Subject: What happened?
MEN,
I hope everybody enjoyed their weekend. Mine was delightful as
usual.
It was Friday afternoon, I was in Charlottesville. Dave and I decided
it was a good time to head to the gym. So we went. As we were
walking down the stairs to get to the gym, I couldn't help but notice
a "MEN" sign over a door. I knew that I had to visit this special
room for MEN only. As I was visiting a urinal, I noticed one of my
favorite quotes of all time inscribed on the valve. Sure enough,
Delany Flushboy. I can't remember what they were mounted on.
But it was definitely the old friend, the DFB.
Friday night came and went.
Saturday afternoon, Bodo's was calling my name. So I went.
While I was eating my tofu/sesame bagel I realized it was time to
pay a visit to the restroom. While I was doing the deed, I noticed I
was dealing with a Sloan Royal. What a disappointment. But
then, I noticed what the Sloan Royal was mounted on. It was
mounted on a Coyne & Delany VB-50. Is this a new discovery? I
wrote down what it was and it escapes me right now, but I am
pretty sure I was dealing with a VB-50 (I will be sure to tell exactly
what model a little later today when I get the paper from my car).
Then yet another new discovery, as far as I know. As I was doing
the deed yet again in Fiji house. I knew I was dealing with the ole'
Flushboy but as I was pulling the lever (flusher) to hear the silent
sound, I noticed an inscription. The tool I was using to create the
flush (flush lever) was a Coyne & Delany "Model No. 3 Flusher."
My first thoughts were about models No. 1 and 2 and how
incredible they must have been, but then I realized that this could
also be a new discovery. I was very pleased.
On another note, I was in Louisa County in the town of Louisa and
I noticed they had some older Mueller hydrants. The only ones of
these I ever saw were in Yonkers NY. Up until yesterday, the
oldest Mueller (which is probably the most popular and common
hydrant in N America) I had ever seen was a 1953 (in Yonkers).
Well I saw some even older ones there in Louisa. and then came
the best hydrant related discovery in a long time. I discovered a
1910 Mueller hydrant. Or so it seemed. as it turned out, it was a
Culan Slan Iron Works hydrant from Chattanooga TN. Being that it
is in the home town of Mueller's hyrant factory and it was oh so
similar in model (including the "belt" as I sometimes refer to it as) I
suspect this is the name of the company before Mueller bought it.
I will be sure to keep everybody posted about it. Sadly, I took no
pictures because I didn't have my camera, but be expecting them
later this month or in Dec.
OK, well that is it. If anybody has some feedback regarding the
VB-50 or the Model No. 3 please let me know. How do you feel
abou these?
Ethan
"TURN TO SILENCE"
http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~dm8k/men/dfb.shtml
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Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1998 18:25:35 -0500 (EST)
From: Ethan Kennedy [ekennedy@netspace.org]
To: flushboy@usa.net
Subject: DELANY UPDATE
Friends of the Flush.
I think it is very important that you all take the time to visit the
following website. It is concerning a case in the Virginia Dist. Court
that Coyne and Delany of the infamous Delany Flushboy were involved in. I
have not yet reviewed all the material but it is definitely important
stuff regarding the company and some law suit about health benefits
(Coyne and Delany Co. v. Selman). Check out:
http://www.law.emory.edu/4circuit/oct96/941676.p.html
It is sure to be interesting to all.
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Date: Mon, 9 Nov 1998 19:17:04 -0500 (EST)
From: Ethan Kennedy [ekennedy@netspace.org]
To: flushboy@usa.net
Subject: more links
Here are some more links that I got while I was busy "working" at the
computer lab today. Some of them are pretty interesting. Others are not
so interesting. THere is a brief description about them so you know what
they are about.
http://www.arcat.com/search/arctmail.cfm?id=1931
has a link so you can send an email to Coyne and Delany
http://members.tripod.com/~Delaney_Flushboy/index.html
a band from Ontario named Delaney Flushboy. Personally this bothers me
and I am tempted to take action.
http://www.nyrp.com/hmtl/body_specials.html
a page with a DFB for sale ($10.95) apparently a special. has a little
drawing of a DFB.
http://www.brozexport.com/proddesc..html
I forgot what this one is it might have pictures though.
Anyway, I think I am Delanied out for awhile, I just have been bored and
am trying to avoid schoolwork like I should be doing.
Take it easy,
Ethan
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Date: Mon, 16 Nov 1998 10:48:57 -0500
From: Mark
To: flushboy@usa.net
Subject: RNRWND
Good news, DFB fans of America.
I just had a feeling all day Friday that I was going to hit the
jackpot. Friday night Michelle and I went to this restaurant called
Spring Street Natural. She went down to check the women's bathroom
but reported American Standards. I wasn't afraid.
I went down to the MEN's bathroom and sure enough there were two DFB-like
toiletron urinals on the wall, but they weren't quite DFBs. They were
very new looking and all the features seemed a bit exaggerated. I looked
for the name and there it was - I had found a pair of Coyne & Delany Rex
Valves.
Still, I wanted to see the old friend. I went into the single stall
and could just barely make out the engraved text on the valve. What's
this? A Delany Flushboy Water Saver, but with NO "Turn-To-Silence."
Yes, it's true... I was so confused by this that I even went back and
checked 10 minutes later, just to make sure.
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From: "Ethan Kennedy"
To: flushboy@usa.net
Date: Mon, 16 Nov 1998 09:53:02 -0500
Subject: RE: RNRWND
> I just had a feeling all day Friday that I was going to hit the
> jackpot.
Strange phenomenom, I get these feelings sometimes, too... you
can just tell when you are in for such a treat.
>I looked
> for the name and there it was - I had found a pair of Coyne &
> Delany Rex Valves.
I envy this for I still have never seen the infamous Rex.
>A Delany Flushboy Water Saver, but with NO "Turn-To-Silence."
Imposter? That's pretty strange.
I am having a good feeling about this weekend, too, perhaps it is
calling to me.
The Final AJ
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From: dmansou@adn.alcatel.com
To: dbodamer@asce.org, janssemp@wfu.edu, mark@naweb.com
Date: Tue, 16 Mar 1999
Subject: Re: Potential DFB sighting
RESOLVED This day, Tuesday the 16th of March, in the year
nineteen hundred and ninety-nine, that DFBs shall no longer be
separated into "inscribed" and "uninscribed" categories.
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From: sudama
To: [undisclosed]
Date: Tue, 6 Apr 1999 00:09:04 -0400
Subject: [flushboy] At long last, the truth.
I cannot convey how it pleases me to finally be able to write this
letter. Oh, the agonizing months spent hiding the truth from family and
friends! Oh, the heartache and suffering that must ensue as this truth,
previously known only to one dear fellow, perhaps the only man whose
capacity for embracing fate's cruel cousins, deceit and lament, exceeds
mine own, verily astonishing as it is, which fellow, heretofore waiting
to exhale, must breathe at least as great a sigh of relief as do I at
this hour of revelation when the fruit of that great and only tree is
shown clearly to be borne from the seed of betrayal.
And a sweet fruit it is, for I, my friends, have, in addition to dividing
this sentence into far too many clauses, juiced the fruit of the tree of
knowledge, and, if I may be so bold, a finer juice has not yet stickied
this chin.
You see, I must expect that some quantity, more likely all than none, of
those reading this have been informed of my pending (impending? it is no
matter) nuptials, which are to have been taking place in the Commonwealth
of Virginia one and one half months hence. Which brings me to the primary
and secondary purposes of this missive, misguided and long-winded though
it may be. Secondarily, allow this to serve as a notice that, despite the
invitation you may or may not be receiving via post in the near term,
none of you are invited to attend my wedding; that is, allow me to
explain that there is to be no wedding. Yes, that is an accurate
statement of fact. Please, bear with me, shocking though this may be.
Allow me to make plain the intended and achieved result of perpetrating
such a cunning ruse upon my friends, family, and unsuspecting "bride to
be." Those that knew a wedding was imminent will have known that it was
to have had taken place in the town of Mineral, a locale which can claim
to exist in partiality upon the shore of Lake Anna, a lake in the
Commonwealth of Virginia. Mineral is proximus to the city of Richmond, a
city penetrated by two rivers which thus serves as a hub of commercial
and residential activity. Pertinently, our wedding, which was to have
been held in the out of doors, being suchly held necessitated the
procurement of a structure which embodied the potentiality to keep
numbers of people in excess of five dozens dry in the case of inclement
weather. That is to say, the answer to the question of what were we to do
in case it would have rained on the day of our marriage is we were "to be
standing under a tent in the out of doors, which tent would have been
procured in the city of Richmond on a day which also would allow for an
excursion to the circuit court building in the down of town of the city
of Richmond in which, we were told, it was possible to both attain a
license allowing such a wedding, between any two persons, of
complementary physical sexual characteristics, present, and of legal age
to enter into the binding legal contract which is marriage, to take place
anywhere within said Commonwealth, and to freely and fully exercise that
great American right and human need of elimination in a public place,
which is not to say that it is a human need to eliminate in public, nor
to say that it is an American right, but only to say that it is a human
need to eliminate and an American right to eliminate in a public place,
assuming that such facilities which would facilitate said elimination are
available, and the aforementioned place indeed meets the crucial
definition of 'public,' which is to say, 'accessible without undue and/or
unprotected restriction' in which protection is understood to be of the
legal sort offered to private property and which place also meets the
requirement of having a bathroom, or as some say, restroom. Either way I
rarely rest or bathe in such facilities."
But I precede myself. Let me recap: we went to Richmond to see about
getting a tent, and to get a marriage license. I hope by now that I have
made sufficiently plain the fact that the courthouse in which we were to
get our marriage license had bathroom facilities which were open to the
public. Ah, the heart leaps in anticipation, the question is all but
audible, would that it were edible as it is indeed upon the tip of
everyone's tongue.
In short, yes.
To elaborate, I of course had justification to investigate, and, indeed,
use the facilities hosted by the courthouse previously described by me.
And indeed, upon use, or rather, immediately subsequent to use, I
confirmed the overpowering suspicion which, in what I suspect to be
covert cooperation with another overwhelming urge I had been subject to,
had driven me through the course of events hereby laid down for your
appreciation, id est the trickery performed upon my immediate and
extended family of friends and relations, the planning and negotiation
necessary to enact the complex chain of events which led to the glorious
triumph of soul over sanity, the triumphant glory of spirit which took
place on Friday the second day of April in the one thousand nine hundred
and ninety-ninth year since that year which we call the zeroth and which
precipitated the fabrication of this thoroughly perfidious tale.
Except for the part about the DFB or whatever -- that part's true.
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From: Exoflalius Niemenfleck
To: [undisclosed]
Date: Thu, 22 Jul 1999 12:31:18 -0400
Subject: [flushboy] DFB Sighting!
Last night at Howard Beach Subway Station I found one of those push button
toiletrons. The seat was the standard white ceramic guy, and above
it was a push-button. I looked at the push button and saw "Delany Valve"
in all CAPS, and walked away, but something called me back.
I looked more closely, and it also said:
"Coyne & Delany Valve Company
Brooklyn, NY"
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